When we first started the adoption process, I secretly stalked a few web forums. Eventually, I started to freely publish comments and things on our agency's forum - and this is where I heard of Twice the Rice (TTR). TTR was a blog written by an adult Korean adoptee, Ji-in who had great insights about inter-racial adoption. I began to regularly read TTR - and it began to shape some of my thoughts about our own adoption.
Being an inter-racial family wasn't something I ever thought about. We had desired to adopt since getting married, and in my mind, we were always going to go overseas to adopt. The word "inter-racial" really didn't mean anything to me. My eyes were opened by reading TTR. To hear from someone who walked the same path as our little guy. Hear her express her frustrations and joys of being adopted really opened my eyes to what it means to be an inter-racial family.
I'm sorry to say that Ji-in has retired TTR. She had been maintaining her blog a lot longer than I have been writting this one, and I can imagine that it could get tedious to be the center of attention for so many pre-adoptive, adoptive families as well as adoptees. I'm bummed because I loved hearing her perspective.
Despite the retired status of TTR, I encourage any adoptive parents (or interested parties) to go check out the blog. Wander through the archives and see what you find. There are great topics to really get you thinking. Sometimes we adoptive parents get on our 'saved the world, one kid at a time' high-horse. We're told by friends and family of what a wonderful thing we've done. As if we plucked our children out of hell itself. I admit, sometimes it's nice to hear that, cause it makes me seem really compassionate. But in reality, we have taken the responsibility of raising a child which is not our own. We have promised to love them, care for them, and raise them to be responsible citzens of the world. But no amount of our love will replace the connection to their first mothers nor to their birth countries. Nor should we ever hope to replace those things.
I bid ado to my friend TTR. One blog to another, you really changed my perspective on things. Farewell friend -
//twicetherice.wordpress.com/
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Monday, September 24, 2007
Talk about thick headed!
Most of you know our over-grown labrador named Moby. He's a big lug of a dog (112lbs last time we got him on a scale)very much like Marley in "Marley and Me" - John Grogan. Our Moby has a strange knack for running head-long into things in his over-zealous playtime. As he's grown older he's slowed down some (example, he's asleep on the bed - most of the bed I must mention), but he's still got a little spunk left in him.
Case in point - yesterday. It is a Sunday tradition that two of the three of us (not including the beast) nap after church and lunch. Well yesterday we all wanted to take a quick nap. So we lay down in bed, and Moby joins right in, taking over much of the bed as usual. Moby doesn't like to nap when we want to nap - he thinks it's his chance to play! So he tries all his tricks to get us to play, and Craig of course, gave in. Moby in the middle of starting up a puppy frenzy (uncontrolled running) decides to jump up on the bed. No problem - he's done it a million times. Except something made him change direction at the last minute causing all 112 lbs of inertia propelling his head in to the banister of our bed. No yelp (from the dog that is, I gasped thinking he'd knocked his head off), he just glued his ears to the side of his head and came running to us for petting. Too bad it didn't knock some sense into him.
I'm telling you that dog's head is made of some strong metal or something. He was never too bright, so we're not particularly concerned about long term brain damage. And the banister is also none the worse for wear. We always knew the dog was thick headed!
Case in point - yesterday. It is a Sunday tradition that two of the three of us (not including the beast) nap after church and lunch. Well yesterday we all wanted to take a quick nap. So we lay down in bed, and Moby joins right in, taking over much of the bed as usual. Moby doesn't like to nap when we want to nap - he thinks it's his chance to play! So he tries all his tricks to get us to play, and Craig of course, gave in. Moby in the middle of starting up a puppy frenzy (uncontrolled running) decides to jump up on the bed. No problem - he's done it a million times. Except something made him change direction at the last minute causing all 112 lbs of inertia propelling his head in to the banister of our bed. No yelp (from the dog that is, I gasped thinking he'd knocked his head off), he just glued his ears to the side of his head and came running to us for petting. Too bad it didn't knock some sense into him.
I'm telling you that dog's head is made of some strong metal or something. He was never too bright, so we're not particularly concerned about long term brain damage. And the banister is also none the worse for wear. We always knew the dog was thick headed!
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Ode to NPR
Oh my dear NPR, my ear soothing friend
Oh how I adore your Morning Edition and All Things Considered
How the careful drone of your report put my child to sleep
Bring me one ear closer to our foreign policy
Tell me what the Senate hearings brought today
And please don't forget my Marketplace fix - and a little The World to boot
Let me ponder the GeoQuiz and torment in my shameful geographic dislexia
Bring Carl Casle to my answering machine
Oh my NPR - Oh my sweet escape - was that my exit I just passed?
Oh how I adore your Morning Edition and All Things Considered
How the careful drone of your report put my child to sleep
Bring me one ear closer to our foreign policy
Tell me what the Senate hearings brought today
And please don't forget my Marketplace fix - and a little The World to boot
Let me ponder the GeoQuiz and torment in my shameful geographic dislexia
Bring Carl Casle to my answering machine
Oh my NPR - Oh my sweet escape - was that my exit I just passed?
Ciao!
Welcome to the new look and feel of Ramblin' Girl! I know you feel lucky to have 3 (yes, three!) posts in one day. I was inspired. So enjoy. Check out the Invasion of the Blogs - good stuff there!
Welcome to the 21st Century...
Let me bring you up to speed.
Women hold one half of all management, professional, and related occupations (according to the 2004 US Dept of Labor Datebook)
Women out number men 4 to 1 in the US (according to GeoHive.com)
Despite my lack of the Y chromosome, I am, in fact, capable of performing my job and managing men.
Why the brief review of the gender world as we know it? I had, honestly, the most bizarre experience of my work life today. Apparently one of the new employees assigned to my client required that he; 1. Not be managed, mentored, or coached by a woman. 2. Not be 'forced' to sit next to a woman. 3. Not be required to meet with a woman in a closed office.
Um.. Huh? Sorry, did you forget exactly what year this is? Or did you just forget to read a bit about our "globally diverse workforce"? After it was explained that these demands would not be met, our new employee proceeded to complain how the company mislead and misrepresented our work environment.
Let me recap...
Won't work with woman (this was the most outrageous of several demands), is complaining that we mislead him. Hmmm Interesting... Exactly what reality are you living in? Lucky for me (and probably way better for him), he quit.
I haven't experienced something as strange and odd as gender discrimination before. At least not this blatantly. I am in no way the best person at my job - but I'm darn capable, and I've worked my ever expanding tush off to get where I am. At 5 years old, I was proclaiming woman's ability and right to drive trackers (and made sure my cousin and uncle knew it - and have never forgotten it!). Maybe it comes from being the only girl (and youngest) in my extended family. Maybe it's genetic from my Mom, who always showed me that women are strong, resourceful, intelligent, and capable people. (Thanks Mom!) Or maybe it's my Dad, who always followed my achievements with a hardy "I'm proud of you" hug, and never lowered expectations because I was the girl. (Thanks DDD) Wherever I got this feminist streak, it is well ingrained within my person. Which would have made working with Mr 1950 difficult, and managing him near impossible.
Who knows why this particular person desired to be in a female free work environment. But as we look at our changing workforce, our changing economic climate, us women are going to be a pretty big force to be reckoned with. So look out world - us woman are here to stay, oh and we'll probably be your next manager too.
Women hold one half of all management, professional, and related occupations (according to the 2004 US Dept of Labor Datebook)
Women out number men 4 to 1 in the US (according to GeoHive.com)
Despite my lack of the Y chromosome, I am, in fact, capable of performing my job and managing men.
Why the brief review of the gender world as we know it? I had, honestly, the most bizarre experience of my work life today. Apparently one of the new employees assigned to my client required that he; 1. Not be managed, mentored, or coached by a woman. 2. Not be 'forced' to sit next to a woman. 3. Not be required to meet with a woman in a closed office.
Um.. Huh? Sorry, did you forget exactly what year this is? Or did you just forget to read a bit about our "globally diverse workforce"? After it was explained that these demands would not be met, our new employee proceeded to complain how the company mislead and misrepresented our work environment.
Let me recap...
Won't work with woman (this was the most outrageous of several demands), is complaining that we mislead him. Hmmm Interesting... Exactly what reality are you living in? Lucky for me (and probably way better for him), he quit.
I haven't experienced something as strange and odd as gender discrimination before. At least not this blatantly. I am in no way the best person at my job - but I'm darn capable, and I've worked my ever expanding tush off to get where I am. At 5 years old, I was proclaiming woman's ability and right to drive trackers (and made sure my cousin and uncle knew it - and have never forgotten it!). Maybe it comes from being the only girl (and youngest) in my extended family. Maybe it's genetic from my Mom, who always showed me that women are strong, resourceful, intelligent, and capable people. (Thanks Mom!) Or maybe it's my Dad, who always followed my achievements with a hardy "I'm proud of you" hug, and never lowered expectations because I was the girl. (Thanks DDD) Wherever I got this feminist streak, it is well ingrained within my person. Which would have made working with Mr 1950 difficult, and managing him near impossible.
Who knows why this particular person desired to be in a female free work environment. But as we look at our changing workforce, our changing economic climate, us women are going to be a pretty big force to be reckoned with. So look out world - us woman are here to stay, oh and we'll probably be your next manager too.
I need to blog at 11pm every night. Why 11pm? Because every night right before I go to sleep, I think of all these great and witty things to write in the blog. And I think to myself - tomorrow, blog that! Only to wake up in the morning, frustrated at having to wake up early and work and all that, and prompty forget everything I had to say.
Sorry to all of you who regularly check my blog, yet another blogless day. At least I can make up everything you need to know about climbing Mt Everest. More on that - later....
Sorry to all of you who regularly check my blog, yet another blogless day. At least I can make up everything you need to know about climbing Mt Everest. More on that - later....
Monday, September 03, 2007
Stitches, Nasal foreign bodies, and Happy Labor Day to you!
My day began with the announcement (through many tears), "I got a lego stuck in my nose!" This was Emmett's way of getting Labor Day started. Why he thought it would be a good idea to stick a lego up his nose - I'll never know. Especially because he won't tell me. "Why did you stick a lego up your nose?" "I don't know". As Bill Cosby said in "Bill Cosby, Himself" - my son has a strange disease, the I don't know disease. It strikes without warning. And Emmett has it!
Craig was out mountain biking with a coworker, so I called to leave a message that we'd be heading to the ER. But instead of voicemail, my own injured husband answered. Bikes were made with brakes, so were trails. Trail brakes are trees, and generally should not be encountered with one's face. Craig was unfortunate enough to use the trail brakes today - with his lips. (Having just watched "The Ultimate Silly Songs" from Veggie Tales, I had a difficult time not huming "I love my lips" during this ordeal, but I refrained for Craig's sake. No pun intended)
I had imagined that one day I might have to take my son to the ER for sticking something where it shouldn't go, but I had never imagined having to walk into the ER and say this. "Hi, this one hit a tree with his face, and to top his Dad, this one stuck a lego up his nose. So where do I sign in?"
It took three tries to get the lego out. And three stitches to get the lip mended. Thank goodness Mom came to help triage between the two broken boys. Three hours later we were back home, recovering from our latest ER trip.
I laughed through most of the morning - I mean, it really was pretty funny. I'm headed to the ER, so why not come along... Family Outing! Many Happy Labor Day wishes to everyone else - hopefully you didn't have to celebrate with the ER staff!
Craig was out mountain biking with a coworker, so I called to leave a message that we'd be heading to the ER. But instead of voicemail, my own injured husband answered. Bikes were made with brakes, so were trails. Trail brakes are trees, and generally should not be encountered with one's face. Craig was unfortunate enough to use the trail brakes today - with his lips. (Having just watched "The Ultimate Silly Songs" from Veggie Tales, I had a difficult time not huming "I love my lips" during this ordeal, but I refrained for Craig's sake. No pun intended)
I had imagined that one day I might have to take my son to the ER for sticking something where it shouldn't go, but I had never imagined having to walk into the ER and say this. "Hi, this one hit a tree with his face, and to top his Dad, this one stuck a lego up his nose. So where do I sign in?"
It took three tries to get the lego out. And three stitches to get the lip mended. Thank goodness Mom came to help triage between the two broken boys. Three hours later we were back home, recovering from our latest ER trip.
I laughed through most of the morning - I mean, it really was pretty funny. I'm headed to the ER, so why not come along... Family Outing! Many Happy Labor Day wishes to everyone else - hopefully you didn't have to celebrate with the ER staff!
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